To set the scene:
25 years ago it was 1982. I was 16 and had just gotten my driver's licence. I was flirting with being born again, although that wouldn't last the summer (it had a lot to do with the pastor caring more about getting republicans elected than about the kids from our school who had been killed in a car accident and with the youth leader trying to pimp out girls from the church instead of the girls I wanted to date). The big songs from the year were "Jack and Diane" and "Heat of the Moment." I started, the day after I turned 16, working at Taco Bell (thanks, dad, for that infusion of Protestant work ethic - I still can't take a fucking vacation). I would end the year dating a very nice girl that I probably should have married but, in a trend that would continue through my thirties, I would make the disastrous choice to go out with someone else right after the new year).
Here are USA Today's 25 things that were huge in 82 and are all-but-gone now:
- Indoor smoking - god; I can hardly believe that during my freshman and sophomore years at GWU I used to sit and smoke in class. All of the English profs used to smoke (the whole department smelled like pipe smoke - a wonderful smell that still reminds me of my grandfather).
- Service stations - for a few cents more you used to have someone check the oil, fill up the washer fluid, clean the windows and pump your gas. Man, I could use that in Wyoming when it's 40 below and the wind is howling down off the front range.
- The Soviet Union. Who would have thought - two of my roommates were "Soviet studies" majors. Wonder how useful that degree is now.
- Typewriters - I had a nice Smith Corona that I started college with. I bought an Apple IIc during my sophomore year.
- Vinyl Records - I went off to college with three crates (remember those?) of vinyl records. Now I have shelves of CDs and soon everything will just live on my iPod.
- New Coke - I hated this shit. God bless old Coke.
- Carbon Paper - my grandfather wrote his entire dissertation using carbon paper. I used it during grad school to make handouts (I do miss the mimeo machine).
- Betamax - I had one of these. All my porn was on Beta. Nice. (Important to have the highest quality)
- Phone Booths - good riddance - I just remember them smelling like pee and never having phone books.
- Leaded gas - my first car was a '77 Caprice Classic that took leaded gas. That thing was a beast (and I loved the built in CB radio and eight track player).
- Rotary dial phones - I had one of these all the way through grad school. Heavier than a 20 pound weight.
- Videos on MTV - how I spent my entire youth. I still watch VH1 classic.
- Baltimore Colts - needless to say, you can add LA Rams, Cleveland Browns, Minnesota North Stars, and some basketball teams to this list.
- Oldsmobiles - lucky me - I bought an Olds in 2000, drove it off the lot, and listened to NPR tell me that Olds was going out of business. Lost a bit of cash on that deal.
- Civility - I've written about this a lot in other places. I miss it.
- American Bandstand - Before MTV this was one of the few places you could see your heroes on TV.
- Pull Tab soda and beer cans - not missed.
- The West African Black rhino - what the fuck? Come on USA Today, you can do better than that.
- Hand crank car windows - you could still get these a few years ago - my wife bought a nice, fancy, Ford Escort with hand crank windows.
- Home run kings - another USA Today dud. So what. Rules get broken.
- Hair bands - I thought Kix, Winger, Slaughter, Poison, Motley Crew, and the rest would be around forever.
- Afternoon newspapers - Used to be the Columbus Dispatch and the Knoxville News-Journal were afternoon papers. Makes me long for the days of the Citizen-Journal, Columbus's excellent morning newspaper.
- Transistor radios - so what. Bring on portable XM.
- Michael Jackson - this one did surprise me. Who would think he would be this weird?
- Checker cabs - sort of miss these - big, roomy, inefficient.
2 comments:
Some comments on your post... I wasn't born until 1984 so I missed the boat on most of these.
Jack and Diane is still a great song, and I don't care who says otherwise.
I can't take a vacation either... thank my grandfather, who would wake me up at 9:30 in the summer to paint, garden, and cut grass.
You can't even smoke in bars anymore. What is the world coming to?
Condoleeza Rice was a Soviet Studies Major.
Ironically enough, one of my first cars was an old Caprice Classic that I drove for about 2 weeks in high school. My parents bought it for like $200 from some dude so I would have something to drive while they looked for something better for me. It was winter and the thing slid all over the place. I drove it until the engine burst into flames. Seriously. Then I got a 1987 Chevy Celebrity which I drove until I graduated from College, and sold because I was moving to DC and wouldn't need it.
Said celebrity had crank windows.
I went to see Motley Crue on their Red, White, and Crue tour in 2001 or so. In my mind, they were one of the greatest bands of the time. Yeah, about that......
Hope all is well.
A.
It was probably my Chevy. I sold it in Cleveland in 1985 (bought a nifty Toyota Celica with a killer Pioneer supertuner iii tape deck that could pick up transmissions from the moon).
One of my buddies worked with Rice in the Bush I white house. He's now repented and works at the Pentagon.
Poison has a new album out and it's not half bad....
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